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You Can Swing It Reality Dating Show Pilot - First Full Length 30 Minute Pilot



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I don't want to buy your shit. See how I've got a huge distro here? Know how that was built up? Who the fuck are you to expect that I'll want to give you cash money for your stuff? See if I want to buy stuff off you, I'll let you know! I very seldom turn down trades because I think it's a fundamental part of the survival of underground music Some wee Johnny-come-lately releasing some crap LP and having the priveleged, expectant attitude that we all owe them a living. I'm warning you cos see when I do get emails like this to which I respond with "can't afford to buy but happy to trade" and you dare to send me back a "Hey man, yeah we don't trade! So think beyond yourselves and don't be selfish twats, the "scene" is bigger than all of you and always will be. Please send payment via Paypal to alastairmabon aol. Everything else after that is ordered by format in the following order: A lot of folk have moaned that this list is cumbersome and annoying to read but you know what? I've spent ten years now listing distro up on here and I hold the idea of actually listening to stuff I get in and giving an opinion on it very dear. Hardly any other distro in the world does this, cos nobody's got an opinion on anything any more other than how many units they can shift and how cool they look posing in daft leather spiky outfits. I spent my youth going through distro lists I got in the mail, reading about bands I'd never heard of and sending off for stuff based on what some guy on the other side of the world thought of it, and this distro list is an unapologetic continuation of that idea. I don't want to just see a Paypal payment in my inbox then ship yer gear out. If you want some middle-class fucking coffee-table vinyl boxset and the ability to pay via credit card without actually communicating with a human being, stick to the Nuclear War Nigels or Hell's Ballbangers. Some of the weirdest vocals I've ever heard. I once accidently saw my cat murdering a frog and the noise it made was this really horrible wee shriek, and this guy's vocals sound like that frog. I did save the frog, so it's possible he just hopped away and became the singer in a grindcore band. It's been ages since I listened to this and in my head the songs were shorter I seem to remember the CD single I had of it lasting for about 4 minutes but there are a couple of decently-lengthed plodders in here amongst the blasts. Doesn't have the grotty stoner sound of Mental Funeral but does have Steve DiGiorgio absolutely tearing it up on the bass, thumping the twisted guitar lines into the dust. Love the simple, bloody artwork too. The past couple of Autopsy albums honestly haven't done much for me, but this and the first comeback album are primo death metal and as good as anything they did first time round. Really punk sounding Abscess was the direction I wanted em to continue with to be honest! The Demo Years LP [Peaceville] Both pre-album demos and a couple of extra tunes, these recordings have surfaced under several names over the years my favourite is the CD with the Mike Diana artwork from the 90s. This is still dear for a collection of demos but better than spending 30 quid on the middle-class gimp-fest that is the Nuclear War Now diehard LP. It's like the metal nerd equivalent of going out for a kids' McDonald's meal. Not too sure if it's really my kinda thing, but if you like an ecclecticly-influenced take on grind, then this is fer you! It's hard to argue; Bathory took the crude musicianship and aesthetics of Venom and moved everything up a notch. What we have here is still a recording that sounds like a more vicious, punk metal take on the Motorhead blueprint. Truly legendary stuff, every metal fan should have this record in their collection! If you're looking for where the true black metal sound really comes from, THIS is it. Brilliant in every way; if you don't have this you don't know metal, simple as that. After three albums of supremely evil, possessed and atmospheric proto-death metal, Quorthorn came somewhat out of left field - although in retrospect this sound had been hinted at on previous records - with this, the first of the "viking metal" genre. Superb, soaring choruses that would make a perfect soundtrack to rowing your longboat into battle then pillaging a monastry, but retaining the brutal, savage rough edge of the early albums. A triumph and one of the best early death metal albums. The previous "Blood Fire Death" had hinted at that but this was the first of his albums that really had that rowing-a-longboat-to-battle sound. Probably the last properly essential Bathory record, recommended. Masterful, epic, driving, emotive metal: Would there be a third trilogy and would he further define the parameters of underground metal? This was a real step back in terms of musical progression but it's nothing like the disaster some people would believe you it is. In fact, as a standalone thrash album, it's pretty great. The vocals are amongst his best and sound totally brutal and some of the riffs are razor sharp. The drums sound like someone's hitting a skip with hammers and there's little variation throughout, but it's still streets ahead of most stuff. So basically, if you have all the "famous" Bathory albums and if you don't, why not? When people say "all Bolt Thrower albums sound the same! You'd be forgiving for not even noticing this one since the band don't seem overly fussed about it, but it's always beena favourite of mine and since the middle class crust punk revival all the wee poshos have been getting into this kind of gear and it's cool again. There's still a big WAAAAAR theme throughout of course but the sound is a lot rougher than the grinding beefy sound of "classic" Bolt Thrower; there's a real loose, dirty punk sound here that few others captured at the time. Also check out the Concession Of Pain demo for further listening! The component parts of the Burzum sound came together perfectly here, and it's never been touched or even come close to being equalled by any band since. The riffs are glacial, their circular nature builds up atmosphere perfectly, and the vocal delivery utterly savage and wretched-sounding, NOBODY sounds like Varg! There were a lot of great records being made at this time but even then Burzum was doing something different and for that reason will always stand out from the pack as the true black metal innovator. Utterly grim and foreboding black metal with truly dark keyboard lines this is early black metal at its absolute peak. Have to say the riffs are really memorable, catchy songs, decent dark atmosphere. It's got a much more "modern" black metal sound that I hear TONS of bands these days nicking, but for me doesn't have the same enveloping evil tone of the first classic EP. Still, if you like fast, memorable riffs this is defo worth a purchase. Conan LP, reissued by Peaceville. These guys have fallen off my radar lately; when they first came out I thought their ultra-distorted driving doom was pretty cool. It wasn't really reinventing the wheel first High On Fire album eh! I'm mostly acquainted with them now via daily posts from main guy Jon telling the world that if you work really hard then you too can be as cool as he is cos he's in a moderately popular band. I think he might be my hero! Possibly cos it's not available to listen to and the promo from Cold Spring is so vague that it doesn't in any way describe the tunes Corrupted have been a band for a while and they're heavy! So, let me do what Cold Spring failed to do and attempt to describe it! I guess this one will turn off tons of Corrupted fans cos, well it's not doom. But then, they did a double album once that had like half an hour of solitary piano on it, and they've collaborated live and released collaborations with Solmania several times over the years. Corrupted's message, sound and aesthetic has been a constant, but the style of music they play has been constantly evolving. This ight be their most esoteric release yet, but it's still very much Corrupted in tone, and any fandan hitting out with "aaaah this isn't Corrupted Side one starts in almost silence, building up layers of deep tone and low end in a way that the band have been doing in a more "rock" format for years. This is suddenly blown away by screeching feedback and white noise wipeouts over a bass sound dangerously threatening the needle of my turntable. I mentoned him earlier, but this sounds like Solmania could be involved again! This violence gives way to some really beautiful shimmering drone to end the side. Second side is a much more minimal affair of building tones and textures throughout; again very heavy. Been listening to this loads since getting it and it gets better and more immersive on every listen. Given that Darkthrone's trilogy of BM classics deliberately sound like they were recorded in a bin, I'm not quite sure how muhc point demo recordings are, but if like me you've listened to those albums a gazillion times, hearing embryonic versions of the tunes is pretty cool. Heavy but melodic, driving and repetitive but catchy, I think it's not bad. Classic tunes start to finish here. This is the one where everything came together in this singular vision of brutal, dystopian, crude hardcore, powered by the d-beat and some of the best razor-sharp sub-Motorhead riffing ever. The raw, barked vocals and sparse lyrics are devestating. One of the finest punk albums ever, no punk should be without this in their collection! Anyway, that's got nowt to do with anything, when I heard it I was totally taken aback: I thought that mabe since it was a pre-order they'd got it mixed up with another band, I couldn't get my head around it. Like most brilliant albums though, giving it a bunch of proper listens totally opened it up to me and it's the absolut perfect follow-up to Dopethrone. Honestly, it's probably the Wizard album I got back to most these days, I think it's absolute lysergic doom perfection. Utterly dark and sinister as fuck and everything about it is totally esoteric Every other modern doom record will totally pale into insignificance. These guys were one of the first to take the black metal sound of the second wave and go in the "viking" direction of Bathory with it. This EP came out at the same time as the legendary first EP by Emperor and was in fact released as a split CD one of my earliest introductions to black metal actually! Which honestly isn't really a bad thing, cos these guys rule. Got their first record when it came out near 20 years ago now from Slap A Ham and they're still as intense as ever. I got this on CD single about 20 years ago and it totally blew me away. It was in the bargain bin in Missing for like 50p and I just thought the artwork was cool as fuck, and there was a song on it called "Dead Men Don't Rape". Dunno what you'd really call these guys Fuck knows, but it's not pleasant. Original copies, got a bunch of these from 25 year-old distro stock! Insanely intense, this is fast, aggressive thrash that is both enitrely influenced by Slayer, Possessed etc, but also holds its own with those bands' original material. If you don't know these guys, you can thank me later! Something that could be described by the discerning thrash afficianado as better than both of them. Chuggy group sex pictures movies

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4 Comments

  1. Doesn't have the grotty stoner sound of Mental Funeral but does have Steve DiGiorgio absolutely tearing it up on the bass, thumping the twisted guitar lines into the dust.

  2. Relapse avante-garde grind from Antigama meets 70s soundtrack style stuff from Anima Morte. In fact, as a standalone thrash album, it's pretty great. One of the best doom metal records to come out of the UK in recent years!

  3. This one is heavy like the old stuff! The number of people who I've turned on to UFO Gestapo and then got back to me to say how blown away they've been is ridiculous!!

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